A Wiccan Journey: Stress, the Pandemic, and new beginnings.

The last year has been hard on everyone, myself included. At first I thought I was doing really great, and all the time off I had, I thought to myself, this would be a great time to focus on my beliefs and strengthen my practice.

I wish I could say that really happened.

Stress, it seems, was affecting me in ways I didn’t realize. All those months that I had to do full moon, or dark moon rites, I didn’t. The solstices came and went and I think I might have done one or two celembrations. Even at the holidays, when I had a good week and a half off PRIOR to the Winter Solstice, I didn’t. I was too tired, or not in the mood or whatever other excuse i came up with to validate not doing them. Even now, when things are slowly going back to the new normal, I didn’t plan anything for the first of August, and as I sit here writing this, it occurs to me that this Sunday is a dark moon. I wrote out a rite for this moon phase, wrote it out exactly one year ago, but as of yet, I still haven’t performed it.

I don’t want to use the pandemic as an excuse, and that’s what I feel I’m doing, but how do I push past the rut I’ve fallen into? Everone says small steps, I get that, but some days doing even the smallest of things is difficult. I don’t want my practice to feel like a chore, and I’m at a loss where to begin. My husband (a practising Catholic) hasn’t been to service in over a year, and even now he’s very hesitant about going anywher near large gatherings.

Maybe I’m overthinking this. Maybe instead of jumping in all at once again, I need to start small. Maybe do one little thing today, like stand outside in the morning and meditate for five minutes, or read one of the new pagan books I bought last year. Yeah, that might be the answer to overcoming this stress. Funny, you don’t realize you’re stressed until you see how it’s affecting your life.

I will keep you updated.

About Darke Conteur
Darke Conteur is a writer at the mercy of her Muse. The author of stories in several genres, she prefers to create within the realms Science Fiction and Dark Fantasy. A pagan at heart, her personal goal it to find her balance within nature; exploring the dark through her stories and the light through her beliefs. When not writing or working with crystals, she enjoys knitting, gardening, cooking and very loud music.

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